How Many Times

by Ruhig

loss

I squat down beside you
Because there are things
I want to say
I’m exhausted in all facets
My lexis fades from me
The shortest simplest way to express
Without retort
Answers to ideas
You imbedded in my brain
I must remember your speech
Taunt and disarrayed throughout
Fresh tears from your face
Forgive a momentary fool
It took me a tick to remember
When we have said
So many things
Walked our own ways
Trying to remain friends in bizarre endeavors
Making it tiring to interpret your melancholy swings
Losing me in thoughts not uttered
Or even considered
I really don’t know what to articulate
When the situations are looked upon as is
Those thespian influencing factors
I’ve lost altogether traction
Becoming not even a fraction
Of what you need
Now it will be
But a memory, in a moment
Just a bad reminder
Of another endeavor
Met in futility

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